Oogkleppen
By Mathias Weststrate (General Manager)
Sometimes you take a conversation with you into your inner chamber. Johanna had recently celebrated her birthday, so we went to visit her. As a birthday gift, I brought her some second-hand clothing. She could sell it to earn a little income. She is one of the poorest people in the neighbourhood. She lives in a simple little house made of corrugated metal, with two rooms: one to live in and one to sleep in. There is no fence around her property, and there are no locks on the doors. Anyone can see that there is nothing there worth taking.
When I walk in, her Bible and her notebook filled with notes are already waiting. She is visibly happy to see us. Not many people come to visit her. Since she began trying to turn away from her traditional ancestor worship, she has found herself increasingly alone. But before I am allowed to sit down, she asks me to come outside with her. She points to a large pile of rubbish near her house.
Stench
“Can you smell the stench?” she asks. It is hard to miss. Then, with reverence, she says, “That is my image. It is here to remind me every day what grace is.” Then she walks back inside. She sits down and begins to tell me about a lesson she learned over the past year.
For weeks, she had prayed that the Lord would give her blinders, like the ones horses and donkeys wear. If only she did not have to see everything around her, she thought, perhaps she would sin less against the Lord. Sometimes she would even rather stay inside than go out into the street, for fear that she might sin again. Until, during a Bible class, it became clear to her that blinders could not solve her problem.
Separation
The problem was not what she saw around her. The problem was in her heart. During that lesson, a diagram was drawn. On one side was man, and on the other was the Name of God. Between them stood a wall. The way to God has been shut off because of our sin. We are born of man and conceived in sin. Our sins separate us from God. And the Lord is of purer eyes than to behold evil.
Micracle of grace
Johanna tells me how she began to understand that even all her good intentions could not bring her one step closer to the Lord. There is nothing in herself by which she can please God. “Unless,” she says, “the Lord Himself does something. A miracle. And that is grace.” Then she looks outside again, at that foul-smelling pile of rubbish. “I am on the wrong side of the wall. Because of my sins, I am a stench before God.”
Black, but comely
She picks up her notebook and mentions two Bible verses: Ezekiel 36:31 and Ephesians 5:2. Then she asks a question, “Can I ever become a sweet savour to God again?” Together, we open the Bible. We come to the words of Song of Solomon 1:5. “I am black, but comely.”
Black in ourselves, but comely in Him. The Just for the unjust. Thou, my sins; I, Thy righteousness. No self-improvement. No good intentions. Only a miracle of grace. And that is the miracle we must come to know.
